Life in general

Summer is coming to a close. I know this because all the seniors are leaving in like two weeks. Ah! I am literally the only one I know staying here. Quite sad! However, I am wanting to focus on the fact that this is where God has me right now. I know this is His will, because no matter how hard I try, it seems like this semester, I am living at home and going to CSU-P. Therefore, I wish to focus on what He wants from me this semester. What really is the point of staying here in Canon and going to school in Pueblo. God, open My eyes to see Your will. Put things directly in front of me-the things you want for me.

I am working on my guitar more. I want to actually be able to play and sing. Hopefully write some stuff eventually. I have written a bit of poetry, but I have always been confused as to how to put that stuff to music. Hmm, guess I'll just have to to dive right in, huh? Anyway, I pretty much figured out how to play "Run" by Snow Patrol. It is still pretty rusty, but sounds semi-okay. Wow! I figured out a song all by myself. Woohoo!

Also, I think I have been wasting time. What is the point to all this junk I have been doing? It is so shallow and surfacey. Why can't anyone under the age of, oh, I don't know, 21, have a deep conversation. Do we always have to talk about nothing? I'm pretty tired of it! Let's actually get out there and live the reality. It seems like too many times we forget that we were put on this earth for a reason-to bring glory to God. Do I ever do that? Hanging out with friends watching movies or watching movies. How am I bringing glory to God in that sense? Yeah, I really think I need school to start. Then I can start being involved with non-Christians, get into Campus Crusade-hopefully, start again at the vet's office, start on my art lessons, and be practicing guitar again. Oh, and school. Learning. Not just vegging all the time. I'm just wandering again. I slacked off big time. Ah! I so get what Paul says about always doing what we don't want to do, and not doing what we do want to do. I have to keep my eye on the prize. Run with endurance the race that is set before me!

Continuing

Thanks for all the excellent comments. There is a lot to think about! I have concluded several things-at least for now. I realize that opinions change as one experiences more of life. For one, I realize-as I did before-that there are certainly general differences between guys and girls. Specifically emotional ones. In general, there have been studies that show that women have a more inate sense of mercy, and guys of justice. This may not be true for all, but it is in general the way things work. This brought me to a very obvious conclusion that when a guy and a girl get married, they really do balance each other out. Instead of an extreme of mercy and one of justice, the two come together and balance each other out, causing something that is closer to what Jesus goes for. Both 0f them used, but at different times in different situations.

Second, I believe that generally women are capable of the same exact things men are. Biologically speaking, as stated before, men generally have more muscle mass, therefore often run faster or lift more. However, I believe it is also true that many women with hard work can do a lot of things men can do. Concerning such things as decision making, I think women are perfectly capable. However, once again, it is probably true that when two people come together, the decision is better since two opposite personalities have come together to make a more balanced opinion.

This all to say that I believe men and women are COMPLETELY and UTTERLY equal. They just generally have differences, and I as I hear from many, it seems that when those two come together, things are more complete. Which makes me wonder about Paul who says that if at all possible stay single. I guess everyone has a diferent calling in life, right?

I would like to address something Rabenstrange mentioned: "I think it is healthy for young people to focus on marriage and preparing themselves to be a good partner.

Next to the decision to follow Christ, marriage is the biggest decision a person can make. It is also one of the most fulfilling things in life.

Obviously an obsession with the future can be harmful but I think Ms. Friedan makes a serious error in trying to dampen the dream of marriage for girls."

I totally agree. I think marriage is a huge and awesome decision that one should totally prepare for all of a lifetime. I just think it is kind of a bummer (this could just be a personal thing) when I meet girls-or even guys-that have only the dream of getting married. Okay, that is fine. But until the day they do get married, they really don't do anything. I think the years of being single are an excellent time to serve God. Serve Him in a way you may not be able to when you have a husband and possibly kids to consider.

Masculinity Vs. Femininity

See edit at bottom

As I have already stated, I have been reading "The Feminine Mystique" by Betty Friedan. Though this may cause you all to gasp and wonder what kind of weirdo I am, I must say that the author has several interesting points. I think that many so many young women base their whole lives on marriage. They think of nothing and no one except that one man they don't even know and finding him. What a waste of time! I even find myself doing that. Instead of getting interested in things I like or getting closer in my walk with God, I can have a tendency to concentrate way too much on the future and who may be in it.

If and when I ever did get married, I have always had the conviction that I would like to keep pursuing my interests-working in the field of animals or biology part-time, reading, playing soccer-the same things I do now. At some point, I want to be a Mom, but I would really like to split a lot of those responsibilities with the person I may marry. For example, I think it would be great if both my husband and I worked part-time and then both of us dedicated time to homeschool kids. Anyway, those are some good things in the book.

However, some of the negative aspects of the book include the fact that the author appears to have some sort of desire to differentiate in no way between the male and female genders. I have strong convictions that there are many differences-anatomical and otherwise-that make us different. My problem is that generally the female sex seems to be the one with the weaker traits. Pardon me if I hurt anyone's feelings, but it seems to me that stereotypically, women are the weaker ones, the ones that take lesser roles (specifically in churches), and so forth. Now to clarify, it has been scientifically proven that most women cannot gain the same muscle capacity as men and there are some roles that women cannot take in churches-certain teaching roles. I have always felt like the lesser gender in this sense. However, it appears to me that possible women have these traits in different areas. Strength in other areas and teaching roles in other places.

Here is an interesting article!

I will keep researching this issue and until then do the things I love to do that may not be typically girly. I have my own tile business-which gives me some muscles enabling me to beat guys at arm wrestling. Bwa ha ha! I love that....
I'll play soccer harder and longer than a lot of the boys on the field.
I will get ready in the morning faster than many of the guys I know. Who needs half an hour to do hair....?
My guitar, not my makeup, will be one of my favoritest possessions.
I will refuse to wear a dress until I absolutely have to-I'm planning the day I get married. :)

But then I can also once in a while do some of the silly girly stuff. Once in a while, I will drag myself to the mall to shop with my sister. (Even though I may visit the game store while everyone else buys t-shirts.) If I ever love a guy, I would probably wear some makeup and dress up a bit. But only because I loved him. :) I'll write in my notebook-not diary-religiously everyday. I'll look at all the baby girl clothes and Wally World and think they are way too cute. Girlmore Girls will be one of my favorite shoes.

But no matter what happens, I am determined to wear white Converse with my dress if I ever got married. There will be no talking me out of it....

So, I don't know. Are there traits that characterize EVERY single girl or guy in the entire world? Or is it just physical differences?

*Edit* Okay, so TBQelite says the following: "The lesser gender? I think not.

Perhaps, though, the gentler one. Most certainly the fairer of the two.

As to your last question, I would say that: yes, as a general rule there are traits that I'd attribute specifically to guys or gals. But that's just a generalization and there are certainly exceptions to it."

My question is this: If there are generalizations, within which exist exceptions, what really is it that makes guys different from girls. Is it solely anatomical differences?

Good one

1. My ex is…non-existant. Never dated. Therefore, I have no ex. I never wish to have an ex as a matter of fact. Sometimes I consider the merit of arranged marriages. Ah! What am I saying?
2. I am listening to… Kutless' new CD which I would so love to get! Would anyone like to buy it for me?...
3. Maybe I should…move to a completely new place so that I can have a completely new life and not be surrounded by all the oldness and weirdness. But likely no matter what I do, problems will follow. I can't run. But I want to, and I am convinced that it would work!
4. I love…my family. Yeah, most would say a guy, but I don't have one. Someday I would like to have one, but that isn't God's plan right now. Sometimes I wonder if God thinks it is funny to give us this desire to love someone, but not give us the someone.
5. My best friend…would probably have to be Emily I do believe. I am definantly blessed to have a sister that I get along with in the same house as I. I'll never be without a friend. Unless, I move to Missouri. Oooh, I forgot to tell you all about that!!!
6. I don’t understand…life quite often. It changes so much. One minute, I am looking at a sunset thinking it is the most amazing thing in the world. God created this for man? The next, it seems like the whole world is against me. Sometimes it feels like I am completely alone and isolated with no one to talk to.
7. I lose…my wallet. Not good! A few days before my 18th b-day, I had to go get a new license. On my big day, I had no picture ID, therefore, no fun 18th b-day fun requiring pic ID.
8. People say…lots of things. Sometimes I wonder how much of it is really of any substance. Why do we talk about such menial things? So much is at stake and happening in the world. Why do we restrict ourselves to the latest highschool gossip and food?
9. The meaning of my screen name is…meaningless. I find humor in weird food descriptions/names. Which is why my screen names and passwords for everything consist of food descriptions/names.
10. Love is…not what most think it is. It is not the whole mushy, gushy, romantic thing. It is actually hard. Being Christlike when someone is being...well, humanlike. Which makes me wonder why people even say things like I just want to be in love. Who would want that?
11. Somewhere, someone is…lonely. And searching for truth. The world seems to hold no meaning and value. What is the point of life? But there is an answer...
12. I will always…wonder what life would have been like if I had made different choices. What if I had acted a different way the other day? What if I had chosen to go to a different campus last semester? What if I had made a different impression in that interview? Every action has some sort of result or consequence. What type of choices will I make?
13. Forever seems…kind of scary really. I am actually going to live forever? Heaven actually used to scare me. But now that I see how hard life can be and how oppressive sin can be, I am actually really looking forward to it.
14. I never want to…look back on life and regret not doing something. I never want to think "I should have". Never.
15. My mobile phone is…great! I never expected to actually have one, and now I do. What a great 6:00 in the morning surprise.
16. When I wake up in the morning…I get in the shower right away. Or if I have work, I get dressed and ready right away. Breakfast follows extremely soon afterwards.
17. I get annoyed when…people are unkind. When they exclude or ignore. I hate it. With a fiery passion. It is probably the most hurtful thing in the universe. I hope people realize that. How much it hurts. How much it sucks. Ouch!
18. Parties are…sometimes fun. I am not a very outgoing person, so in general, I am really not very comfortable. But I am trying very hard to think of making others, not myself, comfortable in those situations.
19. My fish is…died. So did the one I had before that. Great guys! Uh, let's see, I had Oceanus Oooh-haha, and I forget the other one. That sounds so rude...
20. Kisses are the worst when…someone gives it to you and they don't really love you. Or at least I am assuming. Never had a kiss, so I wouldn't know. Yeah, I know, me and the other two people in the world. :)
21. Today...was a good day. I slept in, went to a craft fair where I saw a few people I knew, took a nap, read, had some bibletime, went to the park, and watched some gilmore girls.
22. Tonight I will…sleep. Although tonight consisted of the whole gilmore girls thing.
23. Tomorrow I will…go to church and to lunch with some friends. Should be fun. Oh, and I will probably read, watch some more gilmore girls, and lament the fact that the week has already arrived.
24. I really want…to go to college of the ozarks in spring. I found out I am on a waiting list, not completely rejected. Joy! So, all, I may move in a few months. Isn't that crazy? I am extremely excited about all of this!

Lady in the Water

I am a huge M. Knight fan. I never buy movies, but I think I would someday like to buy his: "Unbreakable", "Signs", "The Village", and "Sixth Sense". I love everything he has done. Including "Lady in the Water". He seems to use such ordinary people. The situations are extraordinary, but the story is done in such a way that it seems as if it could really happen. The characters are always people full of character and values. And no matter how intense the movie may get, there is always a little bit of humor. :)

There were a lot of mixed reviews in my group concerning this movie. I think the big thing is to go into the movie, knowing it is actually a bedtime story, not a scary movie. It was different and original. I can't say much, because I think it would ruin it.

Great quote in the movie (Paraphrased, because I can't find a transcript online.) "Every person thinks they are alone in this world. They are not. Everything they do effects someone else".

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

Oooh, whoppersandpopcorn dedicated a song just to me. How fun! Check it out here. I didn't even realize it was good old Cyndi Lauper. :) I watched Goonies recently, and watched her music video. It was cracking me up. Her other song "Time After Time" is another good one. Reminds me of riding in the car with Josh and Sarah on the way back from California. Fun stuff!

Love

Discipleship last night made me think of a few things. We were reading in Romans 12, and I will highlight the verses that stuck out to me or caught my attention.

*Note* In both this chapter and 1st Corinthians 13, the famed "love chapter", after the gifts of the Spirit are named, the importance of love is immediately stated. No matter what type of spiritual gift we have, love is something that cannot be left out of the formula. So many times, I get stuck in the rut of doing all these things that are "good" and "right". But if I am not doing them in love, what is the point?

Verses 10 through, um, well, 21. Hmm, I just realized that is all the chapter. So much for highlight a "few" key points. This is a great section. It just talks about how we can treat others-specifically those who have hurt us. No matter how frequently or deeply someone hurts us, we still have the opportunity to show Christ's love to them. I have experienced this recently myself. I was hurt. I went from being sad, to extremely angry, to bitter. When I get down to it, I ask myself what right I have to even be angry? How many times have I treated Jesus in the same way I was treated? Way too many to count. But he countered my actions with total and unconditional love. If only for the sake of thanking Him for that, can't I treat others in this way? Overcome evil with good! This sounds slightly cliche, but I think everything can be overcome with love. Anything can be overcome with longsuffering, kindness, humbleness, self sacrifice, good thoughts, thinking the best, rejoicing in truth, bearing all, believing all, hoping all, and enduring all.

"Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away.
For we know in part and we prophesy in part.
But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be down away...
And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love."

Side note: Sorry to you if you read magazines. I finally have an argument for the stupidity of magazines like "People" and "Elle". How sad is the world that thinks this is literature....
"The very size of the print is raised until it looks like a first-grade primer...Does the size of the print mean that the new young women, whom all the magazines are courting, have only first grade minds?"
Admittedly, this is a quote by Betty Friedman in "The Feminine Mystique". Yes, I am reading this book. Anyway, interesting thought.

You Know You're Crazy About Books When...

*Check out new sidebar stuff!*

You know you're crazy about books when...

...one of your life goals is to visit the biggest bookstore in the world.

...you read while getting dressed. (It is difficult, but possible.)

...you run out of books to read in the small town library (Penrose had the smallest library ever. It was in an old trailer that was about 30 feet long.)

...your ideal gift card is from a bookstore and not a clothes store.

...many of your little kid memories are centered around either books or Reading Rainbow. (Oooh, this makes me think that I should do a little kid book post. Oooh!)


***Tag rules: Insert any word you like into the phrase "you know you're crazy about ________ when..." Must have at least five answers. Tag 5 people.

~I tag: Rabenstrange, Mrs. Clark, Madre, Emily, and Jill

This is currently one of my favorite songs. It is special enough to be written on my Converse. :) No, but really, I will tell one of my deep, dark secrets. You know when things happen that just make you cry-people let you down, you lose a friendship, or you get in a really bad fight with someone special. This all probably sounds really dumb, but I am tired of not being myself. This is the song to listen to and cry a little bit. But then when it's over, I gear up for life again. Keep on going with God going before and behind me. Maybe someday I will have someone that is doing the whole life thing along with me, but until then, I keep running the race of life in the situation I am in.

Full moon in a cloudy sky. The storm just passed along with the dirt the rain washed away. The clouds look like an inky ocean just out of my reach with the moon setting on the horizon of the sea.

Jaded

Can I get to this place?

Something's different between you and me/And I'm not
sure if it's good or bad/And all I know is from what I've seen
Maybe it's I who has changed/The feelings I had rearranged
The space that's between us/ Becoming a hole as I'm growing
older/CHORUS/I'm almost faded/Passions jaded/Passions
jaded/By my heart/Something's changing between you and
me/A bond that is melting so painlessly/A weight has been
lifted from you and I/Maybe it's better this way/I can't help
but feeling ok/This sweetly is forming and molding my soul
As I'm growing older/CHORUS/If this is true, God set us free
Perhaps you and I were not meant to be/And if in the end we
drift apart/I want you to know God used you right from the
start/Maybe it's better this way/I can't help but feeling ok
This sweetly is forming and molding my soul/As I'm growing
older/CHORUS

Psalm 139
8-If I ascend into heaven, You are there;

If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.

9- If I take the wings of the morning,

And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,

10 -Even there Your hand shall lead me,

And Your right hand shall hold me.

Colossians 1

This was basically my "theme" chapter at camp. It really helped me get through some hard stuff I needed to get through, and gave me a better idea of how to talk to God.

Colossians 1
9-11-The whole purpose of knowing God's will is not to have our ducks in a row or have a our lives be perfect. Rather it is for the purpose of glorifying God. At first I was trying to focus on the little answers and just getting it and going on with life. But that wasn't what God wanted. He wanted my heart. He wanted me to seriously give up what I wanted and go with His will-even though I didn't know what it was yet. It is really hard, but I surrendered to Him, and I got the answer I was seeking.


17 -He is before all things. I can stop-or try to stop-worrying so much about life and what will come from the decisions I have made. It is okay. He is before all of my life.

21-23-What a huge blessing. We were foreign creatures in our sin and God had the love and mercy to show us as completely holy. What an amazing thought. Completely clean. Absolutely no sin. Continue steadfast in your faith. Do not waver!

29-This life is not just something to be lived getting as much fun out of it as we can. This is a race. There is a purpose and an end. I have to live it in this way.

I'm a nerd....

I am proud to announce ladies and gent that I got a 71. You know, I was at the table earlier eating and talking about some biological function of the human body to my parents. Due to all the practice I have had in this area, I started to see my parents and sister's face turn green. Therefore, I decided to stop talking about the fascinating subject I was discussing. I realized how in heaven I am going to be when I start at university. I will be a biology geek surrounded by a ton of other biology geeks. I may even join the bio club and get an even geekier t-shirt that proclaims to the world my high level of nerdiness. Man, this semester is going to be awesome! :)

Quiz Thingy

[1, What is your name?]
Danika. Or Gazelle, Kiwi, Beautiful #2 (Don't take that as conceited. It is a funny story.), HB Danika, or Dani. Among other things....

[2, What did you eat last night for your supper?]
I didn't really have dinner. I had some popcorn, some ice cream, some Mike and Ikes, some grapes, and that is about the extent of it.

[3, What is your job?]
I own my own tile business. It is only temporary, however, to get me through school.

[4, What do you like to do?]
Reading, hanging with friends, worshipping God, watching movies, and watching/listening to rain/thunderstorms to name a few.

[5, What is you favorite type?]
Guy-wise? For now, I know I want a guy who loves God and it shows through his actions.

[6, What is your special ability?]
Doesn't special mean very few others can do it or you are an original person? Uh, I don't think I have any of those skills. Get to know me and you can answer this question.

[7, Do you have any license or qualification?]
Driver's license and license to kill are the only two I can think of.

[8, Do you have concerns?]
Life is one big concern I have decided. But I think my biggest struggle is to be anxious for nothing. Trust in God!

[9. What is your favorite food and dislike food?]
I love ice cream, and I hate peppers.

[10. Say a word for a person you love]
I am not in love.

[11, Write 5 people you want to give this baton message]
That person, this person, another person, you person, internet person

Blessed Be the Name

Blessed be your name
In the land that is plentiful
Where the streams of abundance flow
Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,
I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name

Blessed be your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's all as it should be
Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,
I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, Blessed be your name

Rain Streams Down the Window

What is the point of life? How lame that I go from being at the top of the world to contemplating the purpose of existence. Someday, I am going to resolve to become a hermit and truly do it. I always threaten, but so far they've always been hollow. One day....

It has been cloudy and rainy all day. Joy, weather that matches my mood. Oh, the irony of it all!

But then I turn around and realize how ridiculous I am being. Just look how good I have it. I have no place to talk. No place to even whisper a complaint. Sometimes I wish something really bad would happen just so I would actually have a reason....What am I thinking?

Vacation

It is time for me to write a certifiable post. I would try to tell you all about my vacation, but that is basically impossible. So much happened that it just isn't possible to summarize it. Therefore, I will just write some of the highlights. Okay, first thing that comes to mind is ocean sunsets. We were in Monterey right before it set, and I was just completely in awe. The waves were crashing up against the rocks, the sky was brilliant, and it even smelled great. I guess these things just go to show that nature really does give us reason to praise God. This may sound drastic, but I feel like I could have died right then and I would have been happy. I felt so amazed by God, and it was a perfect place to be. So, yeah, that would be highlight number one.

Highlight number 2: God really talked to me about some issues concerning leadership. I realized that I was not being the leader to my siblings that I have the responsibility and opportunity to be. I have so much influence over them, and I made the mistake of forgetting that. I just thank God for his grace and willingness to remind us of the things we forget. Leadership is influence!

Highlight number 3: I realized the importance of pursuing answers from God. Usually, I ask something, don't get an answer, and just decide to go with the flow of life. Big mistake! At camp, I was determined to press on until he gave me an answer on a specific question I had. I kept going until I got that answer. It may have been a hard decision, but in the end, I know that it will be the best thing. The best thing because it is His will, and not mine.

Miscellaneous stuff: Don't go to Menlo College. The dorms are CRAZY!
Have you ever had an open faced turkey sandwich? Oooh, I did for the first time. Yummy!
Don't you love it when God absolutely forces you to get out of your comfort zone. I would never have done it otherwise. Thanks, God!
Must read more. Ah! I wish I could just dedicate half my life to reading.
I'm in that place once again....
How drastically life changes in such a short amount of time.
To God alone be the glory!
Ghiradelli ice cream rocks, just don't get the earthquake.
HB Danika! :)
I made a several foot long Starburst wrapper chain from the wrappers I accumulated at camp. It is way cool!

Okay, I'll stop now. More later. Chao! And have a great weekend. Anyone going to see "Pirates of the Carribbean"?

I'm back!

Okay, after two weeks, I am getting back into normal life. I will resume my blogging habits once again. :) Vacation was great. I will expound more later, but for now, I will say that it was really good. It was a pretty physically and spiritually tiring time-campwise-but it was worth it as far as what God talked to me about.

Hope everyone had a great two weeks!